Words worth keeping

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

The story so far:In the beginning the Universe was created.This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.

Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

Reality continues to ruin my life.

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.

I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

Remember, we're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me anytime you feel like it.

A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.

It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.

Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.

Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?""Yes," said Harry stiffly."Yes, sir.""There's no need to call me "sir" Professor."The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying.