Quotes

Words worth keeping

296 quotes — from Indian and world voices, in English, Hindi and Urdu — while our publisher catalog grows.

Filtered by: Humor Clear all

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

— Oscar Levant
Humor

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

— Thomas Szasz
Inspirational Humor

Death's got an Invisibility Cloak?" Harry interrupted again."So he can sneak up on people," said Ron. "Sometimes he gets bored of running at them, flapping his arms and shrieking...

— J.K. Rowling
Humor Death & Loss

Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

— Mark Twain
Humor Books & Writing

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more?

— Chris Rock
Humor

It means 'Shadowhunters: Looking Better in Black Than the Widows of our Enemies Since 1234'.

— Cassandra Clare
Humor

Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?""Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom."...I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoe just looked at me. "I do not understand.""I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said."And..." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam t-shirt.

— Rick Riordan
Humor

Well, don't expect us to be too impressed. We just saw Finnick Odair in his underwear.

— Suzanne Collins
Humor

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

— Douglas Adams
Humor Books & Writing

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

— Garrison Keillor
Humor Faith & Religion

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

— Robert A. Heinlein
Humor Women

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.

— Charles M. Schulz
Humor

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.

— Jim Henson
Humor

I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

— Woody Allen
Life Humor Death & Loss Fear

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.

— Paul Terry
Humor

World quotes adapted from the Abirate/english_quotes dataset (CC BY 4.0). Indian-figure and Hindi/Urdu quotes are a curated compilation of widely-attributed public sayings.